In my Veins
by Deimoslestrange
Summary: What if Harry didn't go to live with the Dursleys? What if Severus Snape adopted him and raised him as his son? In my veins tells a completely different and heart wrenching version of how the chosen one came to be.
1. Falling

**Falling**

The night was dark and dreary. Albus Dumbledore paced the headmasters office, waiting on news... any news of the dark lords movements. He knew tonight would be the night. He sent his Aurors to the Potter residence in Godrics Hollow. That's where Voldemort would strike. Albus paused briefly, thinking he heard footsteps falling outside in the study, then resumed his slow steady pace back and forth. Moments later someone knocked loudly and rapidly on the door.

"Enter..." Albus spoke softly, dreading the news.

Alastor Moody stepped inside the door, he held his head low, a mixture of rain, sweat, blood and tears addled his appearance. "We arrived too late, Albus, I'm sorry." He took a deep breath and waited for Albus' reaction.

For the first time in many years Albus collapsed, he fell to his knees and let the tears stream down his face.

"We tried to save them, but by the time we fought our way in, we saw James lifeless outside the babys room, lily..."

Albus rose his hand in protest, "I don't need to hear anymore." He could only imagine the torture Lily and James endured.

Alastor wiped his eyes. "The boy survived Albus."

Albus looked up toward the heavens. "Harry survived the curse?"

Alastor nodded.

"Send for Severus, go now!" Alastor did as the headmaster said.

Albus sat at his desk. The boy had survived. How was that even possible? He thought. He raised his wand to his temple and removed a silver strand and placed it in pensive. It was beyond a miracle that a mere one year old potentially defeated the Dark Lord. Albus shook his head astonished by what had happened.

Kingsley Shacklebolt silently entered the room. "The boy is stronger than anyone thought possible."

Albus looked up. "He survived the killing curse... He should have died, but he lives."

"Voldemort has vanished."

"What does this mean?" Albus asked himself silently.

"It means, headmaster, that we are free. The Dark Lord no longer reigns."

"Surely he's out there. Somewhere, defenseless, weak, hiding in the shadows..." Albus' face twisted darkly.

"Gather the Aurors, perform a search, leave no cave unexplored, no rock over turned till he is found."

Kingsley bowed his head and left.

Albus began his pacing, though more rapidly. He was interrupted by Alastor and Severus. Severus carefully carried a bundle of blankets. Tears streamed down his face. Albus walked slowly over to them. He removed the blanket to see a sleeping baby, untouched by evil, all except for a lightning bolt-shaped cut on his forehead.

Severus handed the baby over to Minerva as she walked in the office, he got in Albus' face. "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM. YOU PROMISED!" tears flooded down his face. "She's gone." Severus collapsed to the floor

"You put your faith in the wrong hands." Albus said quietly.

Severus sobbed for a moment then pulled himself together.

"What do you suppose you're gonna do with him?" Asked Alastor pointing to the baby.

"The only thing we can do." Minerva said looking into the bright green eyes of Harry Potter. "Let his only living relatives raise him."

"You mean those muggles?!" Severus said shocked.

"Yes. It's the right place for him. With Voldemort so weak, he will not be able to find the boy." Albus agreed.

"I won't allow it." Severus looked at the bundle of blankets. "Lily wouldn't want him with those muggles."

"Severus I know you are heartbroken. We all are, we have all lost a friend, a sister, a brother. Do whats best for the boy." Minerva spoke softly.

Severus took the baby from her and looked into his green eyes, tears leaked from his onyx ones, he had her eyes. He couldn't give that up. Right then and there he made a promise to himself and to the baby, he would do what was right for him.


	2. I'll make it without you

**I'll make it without you**

"Severus are you sure this is what you want to do?" asked Albus.

"Yes." He had never been so sure of his life and where it would lead him, but right here, right now, this is what he needed to do, for Lily, for Harry, for himself.

"Have you thought this through?" Minerva rocked a whimpering Harry back and forth.

"This is what lily would have wanted, for Harry to be protected."

"He would be protected in the Dursleys care." Alastor added.

"Dursleys!" Severus scoffed. "Have you met those people? He asked. "They are the worst sort of Muggles. Petunia hated Lily, she hated me because we were different. She would hate Harry just the same."Severus bit his bottom lip hard as the memories of their childhood came back to him.

"Very well..." Albus trailed off. "Let it be known. Severus you are now father of this child."

Severus held Harry tightly to his body, "I will never let you down." Severus whispered softly to the child wrapped in his arms. "You will want for nothing."

"There will not be a child in this world that will not know his name." Minerva said looking at Albus.

Severus took one last look at the people in the room, and started towards the door.

"Severus, once you step outside that door, there's no turning back. Your life will forever be changed." Minerva placed a guiding hand on his shoulder.

He looked into her eyes, one look said it all. "I know." He left the room gently cradling the child in his arms. "I will always protect you, little one."

Severus grabbed a broom from a closet and carefully situated himself in the middle. He thought broom would be much safer than apparating. He took off towards Spinners end. The cold air hit him in the face. He closed his eyes for a moment. Taking the whole night in a single second. This morning he was just a potions professor, now he was a guardian, a father, a hero. When he reached Spinners end, he left the broom outside his house. Swiftly, he unlocked his door and stepped inside, with a flick of his wrist, light flooded the house. He removed the blanket from the childs face. "Harry, I know you don't understand what has happened, but this is your home now." The child peered out and looked around.

Severus took the child and made his way up a set of stairs, at the top set his bedroom, fair size with a queen sized bed. Silk black comforters draped neatly over the bed, a handsome wardrobe sat in the corner, and solid oak covered the floors. "I know its not much, but I promise you will have everything you want." He pulled the covers back and gently laid Harry in the middle, putting pillows on either side to prevent the child from rolling off the bed.

Severus laid beside the baby, lightly stroking Harrys black hair. Harry smiled and gurgled happily at Severus. Despite all he's been though, he's a happy baby, he thought. He smiled sweetly back at Harry. The child reached his hand up and grabbed ahold of the mans finger, and cooed softly. Severus kissed Harrys forehead gently, tears rolled down his face. He had so much of lily in him. "I already love you, Harry." He cuddled the baby in his arms, Harry soon fell asleep. He silently watched the baby sleep. This was the start of his greatest fear. Losing Lily, and becoming a father, it was also the start of a brand new day. He wasn't going to let it go to waste.

He drifted into sleep, dreaming of deep emerald eyes. Harry.


	3. Light is Night

Severus welcomed the day light. The night was filled of nightmares. Over and over again he would see Lilys lifeless corpse, her eyes accused him of betrayal and murder. He blamed himself every second of everyday. He especially blamed himself when he looked into the innocent eyes of Harry, who not only lost his mother, but his father as well. He couldn't believe all that happened. It was all a blur.

But in the weeks that follwed, Harry mended Severus's heart with every little smile, every little twinkle of his eyes.

Six months had passed, Severus took Harry for a day out. It was a beautiful day, bright sunny skys, birds chirped, and every family seemed to be out and about teaching younger wizards how to fly a broom or playing backyard versions of quidditch, Severus decided to take Harry out on a stroll around Belle Park. Harry giggled happily watching people zoom around on brooms. Severus sprawled out a blanket and gently sat Harry down on it and sat opposite him. Harry crawled towards Sev. "Harry." he chuckled, "Do you ever sit still, my child?" he asked.

Harry looked up at the man, "Dada."

Severus cuddled the child in his arms. "Thats right my son." He kissed Harrys forehead and cradled him. Severus felt the guilt burrowing in his soul. This isn't how things were supposed to be. He knew that it should be James cradling Harry. It was Lily who should be strolling in the park with her family. Severus packed Harry up and went home.

Severus was shysterical by the time he got Harry home. He put the toddler in the crib, and lit a fire, he placed a call within the flames. "You were right." He sobbed. "About the constant guilt, about the boy... about everything." The reciever stayed quiet for a long time. "I need your guidance..." Severus begged.

"I told you this would happen... You never listen to me." The reciever spoke quietly. "I cannot tell you how to erase the guilt, I can only remove the burden..."

"Remove the burden?" Severus asked. "To remove my burden is to take away my life, leaving The boy fatherless, in the care of strangers. I cannot imagine-"

"I don't mean taking your life, Severus..." The reciever interrupted him.

"What are you saying? Are you suggesting taking Harry?"

"It is the only way to ease the burden."

Severus looked at Harry. "Forget we had this conversation. I am not giving him up. I made a promise." Severus extingushed the flames. He sat in his chair and poured a small glass of liquor. Something he hadn't done, or even thought of in the past six months. Soon he found him self pouring a third and a fourth glass. A spilled glass and an empty liquor bottle later, Severus, slumped out of his chair and passed out on the floor.

The morning light broke through the cracked door. Severus opened his eyes slowly, looking around. The front door was open, he sprung to his feet and ran to Harrys empty crib. He frantically threw the blankets up, knowing Harry wouldn't be under them. Severus searched every nook and cranny of his house, yelling out Harrys name. He stopped dead in his tracks pulled his hair, he blamed himself. If he wouldn't have drank, he wouldn't have passed out, he wouldn't have let HER take Harry. How could he have let this happen. What kind of father was he? He was turning into his father... One man he didn't want to be. He lit the flames and placed a call...

Menacing laughter answered. "Severus, my dear..." He reciever laughed, "You made that so easy."

"Give me back my son."

"Or what? Are you going to kill me? Are you going to kill your own mother?!"

"I will have Harry back."

"You are not fit to be a father, A drunk, just like your father."

Severus put the flames out and grabbed his cloak, Gripping his wand tightly. "One way or another I will have my son back."


	4. The Game

Severus mounted his broom, kicked off the ground and rode furiously towards his childhood home. A place he hasn't stepped foot inside in over 30 years. Clearly he and his mother didn't quite see eye to eye. His heart and mind raced as he approached the stone manor. The wrought iron gates began to rust and corrode, obviously the grounds keeper is dead or mother had him fired. Inside the gates plant life seemed to grow thick around the once beautiful manor. Severus paused for a moment, looking over the property he once called home. He resumed his steady pace up to the porch.

Reaching inide his robes, Severus extracted his wand. "Mother, I know you are in there. You have 5 seconds to return my son before I set fire to this damned hell you're living in." He stood silently listening to locks being over turned, the door swung open with an eerie creek. Cautiously, wand first he entered the Manor. Dust had collected on every surface, a revolting odor permeated through the air.

"Harry..." He called out. Upstairs a door slammed, Two by two, the man ran up the stair case. At the end of the cobwebbed hall a door was open. Severus knew Harry wouldn't be there, but investigated. The room had been filled with dolls and nicknacks of his mothers. They all cried out, "Come home Sev, we miss you." They began crawling towards him, grabbing hold of his ankles and pulling him further in the room, he fought and kicked them off and ran towards the door, which slammed voilently in his face. He pulled out his wand and directed it towards the hoard of the crowd and reduced them all to ash. The cries faded, but still audible calling him to come home. He reached for the door knob, but it swung freely open.

He returned to the hall, only it had been transformed into a labyrinth of some sort. He heard his mother cackle loudly. "You'll never find Harry. You will be trapped here with us forever."

Severus started into the maze, taking a left turn, then a right and another left, only to find himself at a dead end. He went on and on. "Mother! Stop these foolish games!" He cried out.

"Games, my dear boy, I thought you liked to play games." His mother spoke softly as she appeared in front of him.

"Where's Harry?!" He demanded.

"Kill me. Burn this wretched place to the ground." She begged. "I am alone, I don't deserve to go on. KILL ME!" She fell to her knees.

Severus knelt beside her. "You left me for dead, You left father to beat me."

Just then Eileen Snape pulled out her wand and sat the house on fire. "Harry is in your room. Leave..."

Severus attempted to pull his mother up and help her out. "You foolish boy... This is my fate. Go on. Save yourself and your son." Severus kissed his mother on the forehead and raced through the heavy smoke and flames to find Harry.

Severus extracted Harry and apparated outside the walls, watching the manor, his mother, and his memories smother and catch fire. He held Harry close. "I almost lost you." tears streamed down his face. Harry hugged him around the neck.

After putting out the last of the fire, Severus mounted the broom with Harry. Off together they flew, Hogwarts bound.

He need guidance, he needed a safe place for Harry and himself, atleast until Harry could protect and defend himself. He sought out Albus... Hoping for his protection... Last time Severus begged Dumbledore for protection two people ended up dead, and a war broke out.

At the gates of the castle Severus spoke the secret code and they swung open. He cradled a sleeping Harry in his arms. Flying always put him to sleep, it was the only way to get the cranky toddler to sleep. Inside the grand castle, he made his way to the headmasters study and knocked on the door.


	5. Hollow Man

"Severus" Came a voice from behind.

He turned around in the direction the voice was coming from.

"Are you regreting your decision?" Asked Albus sternly.

"My mother kidnapped Harry... I'm afraid that its not the worst to come... If the Dark Lord regains his strength, whats going to keep him away from Harry? Albus you failed me once... Please don't turn your back on me now." Severus replied holding a fussing Harry in his arms.

"You know I can't promise anything, Severus."

"All I'm asking is to stay in the castle... There's no place safer than Hogwarts."

Albus inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, "I'm afraid I can't let that happen... You know the rules. Students and staff only."

"I'll teach!" He pleaded. "Madam Pomfrey can keep an eye on him between classes... Albus please. You owe Lily and James a debt!"

Albus thought for a moment and spoke, "As it turns out the position of potions master is open. I know you are gifted... I'm afraid that Harry will be an issue."

"He won't and you know that. Please. I beg you. Let us stay. You always say that Hogwarts will always be open to those in need. We need Hogwarts more than ever." Harry began to wail.

Dumbledore looked out the window. The sky was as gray and unforgiving. He stroked his beard a few times, mulling his thoughts over and again. "You can stay... On one condition..."

"Anything, Albus."

"We have found his whereabouts. We know he is recruiting. I need you to be my eyes and ears." Albus turned around staring Severus in the eyes.

"I don't understand what you are saying, Headmaster..." Severus asked quietly setting Harry down in a chair.

"Yes you do." Albus took Severus by the shoulders and pushed him against the wall. "I need someone on the inside." his voice lowered, "Voldemort doesn't trust easily."

"I can't! I won't!" He cried out.

Albus's face turned dark and twisted. "Then I'm afraid I have no room for you here withing the walls."

"What happened to the man I used to know?"

"He died the night Lily and James died."

Silence filled the room like a poisonous gas, choking Severus. After what seemed like an eternity Severus sighed. "I'll do it."

Albus smiled, "I knew you would come to your senses." He then handed severus a bit of parchment. "His location. Pomfrey and Minerva will look over Harry in the mean time."

Severus nodded and picked Harry up. "I prefer privacy in the dungeon." He left with Harry in arm and his wand in the other.

"Severus?" Albus spoke so softly it was almost dismissed by the man.

He turned around to face the old man who seemed to age by the second.

"I'm afraid you leave tonight. The sooner the better."

Minerva walked in, "You wish to see me, Albus?"

"Severus has some business to attend to, would be so kind to share your quarters with Harry for a while?"

She seen the fear in Severus's eyes, but with held her comments. "Of course." She cradled the sleeping baby. "He will be safe with me. You can trust me, Severus." She left with Harry, leaving Severus alone with his hatred towards Albus.

"It's best to go on foot. It would be too alarming to arrive by Floo or apparation."

"You have become the monster." Severus threw on his over coat and left with the paper in hand.

Outside the castle walls, he took out the parchment. "Lumos." The tip of his wand ignited, cutting through the velvet blackness. The map began to appear suddenly. He recognized it at once. "Albania." He whispered to himself. This wasn't going to be an easy journey. He would need help from an old friend. The night seemed long as he made his way to Wiltshire, England. He didn't want to appear abruptly.

Day started to break as he made his way to the Malfoy Manor.

He stood at the impressive wrought iron gates as a majestic peacock strutted safely behind. The gates opened allowing him to pass through. They must have known he was coming. Severus walked up the long drive gathering his thoughts. What was he to say to Lucius? Surely, he couldn't tell him the truth. He would have him murdered for that.

"Severus." Said a cold voice from behind him.

"Lucius." He froze in his steps.

"I had a feeling you would be joining me soon enough."

"Yes," He paused taking a deep breath. "I need your help."

"Let us discuss in private." Lucius patted him on the back, inviting  
him willingly in.


End file.
